Is change really possible?

 potter Yesterday, I launched a 12 week fall Bible study at my church.  About 20 women gathered and there was much excitement as we opened chapter 1 and began to unearth the gems contained there.  I am glad to be studying with these women and eager to consider the essential role of the Holy Spirit in spreading the good news about Jesus. Luke is so precise–such a researcher–and committed historian.  He records the events that allow us to observe people  being changed from the inside out!  When thinking about that change I remembered these thoughtful words:

“Is it really possible to change?…The word “really” is the issue.  In many people’s minds, change must be nearly complete–at least dramatic–or it doesn’t count…If efforts to restore a drab marriage lead only to a flicker of warmth, then perhaps it hasn’t really changed…Evangelicals sometimes expect too much or, to put it more precisely, we look for a kind of change that God hasn’t promised…We manage to interpret biblical teaching to support our longing for perfection. 

As a result, we measure our progress by standards we will never meet until heaven…We therefore claim God’s power as the guarantee of total change from pressure to peace, from disappointment to joy–and then live with an intolerable burden that either crushes us with despair or requires us to pretend we are better than we are.  The idea that peace and joy might merely support us during times of struggle and sorrow rather than eliminate those times is not appealing. 

 We want to do away with the necessary pain of living in a disappointing world as imperfect people. We insist on experiencing neither pain nor failure, so when the inevitable happens, it becomes reason for discouragement. But there are unnecessary problems that develop when we insist that necessary pain be eliminated…If we were convinced that the trauma of learning to trust God would really change us, we might be willing to endure it.  But real change is available now; it’s just not the kind of change we want. We insist that the real change that heaven will bring (an end to all pain) be ours today.  That insistence is the problem that we must overcome if real change that’s possible now is to occur.” ((Larry Crabb, Inside Out, NavPress, 1988, 203-205))

O Father, you are the Potter; I am the clay–it has never occurred to me before that my desire to change–my hopes for moral renovation might be rushing your timetable–or that it springs from a root of pride that wants to look better in other’s eyes right now!  I sense, that through Acts you will teach me to want the change you want to do in me!  What an adventure it is to live under the molding influence of your Spirit.  Amen

Snakes on a Porch!

Sunday, March 28, 2004

EatingIceCream (Custom)I took cottage #2 to church this morning and then made some cookies and cleaned the house.  It is Mike’s birthday and we decided to celebrate by having the children come for a visit.   We thought it would be fun to let them try ice cream for the first time.  The ice cream here is somewhere between ice milk and Italian ice–not very creamy but it replicates the delight pretty well.   Chloe seemed to enjoy the treat but the others were not all that impressed.  MikesBday1 (WinCE)They found the sensation of cold too intense and they were not fond of the sweetness either!  One man’s treasure is surely another man’s trash!  It was fun seeing them all dressed up and ready for a party.  Earlier in the day, Mike went with the Enis’ into Kampala to go to New City Bible Church.  He had just changed clothes when one of the aunties came frantically knocking at the door.   She was very agitated because she had seen a snake under the plants that surround Mama Teopista’s cottage.   Mike wasted no time and followed her back to the site.  I didn’t think much about it–in fact I thought the snake would be long gone before anyone could hunt it.  Imagine my surprise when Mike came back with a dead green mamba! green mamba He and Mike Enis tried several scary maneuvers to kill this menace–it was after it was dead that I found out it was a green mamba–it is a very poisonous snake here in Uganda.  I should have known that the auntie would not have been that upset for the safety of the children unless there was real danger.  Thank goodness they were successful and the snake was not!  Having the children over for a party just added more excitement to this already exciting birthday.

much love,

lissa

Mike with the green mambaP.S. This day reminded me of the Acts 28 story,  “As Paul gathered an armful of sticks and was laying them on the fire, a poisonous snake, driven out by the heat, fastened itself onto his hand. The people of the island saw it hanging there and said to each other, “A murderer, no doubt! Though he escaped the sea, justice will not permit him to live.”  But Paul shook off the snake into the fire and was unharmed. The people waited for him to swell up or suddenly drop dead. But when they had waited a long time and saw no harm come to him, they changed their minds and decided he was a god.”

How Firm a Foundation?

 Larry Crabb continues to be an author that helps me see underneath and behind some of my doubting thoughts.  In his book Finding God he asked his readers:

“Imagine what it would be like to say the following words from Habakkuk and mean them! (I’ve added a few phrases in italic to bring the passage home.)

Though the fig tree does not bud

and I am alone;

and there are no grapes on the vines,

and I can find no joy in my world right now;

though the olive crop fails

and I have nothing to soothe my open wounds;

and the fields produce no food,

and I am out of a job or hate the one I have;

though there are no sheep in the pen

and no one warms me on cold nights

and no cattle in the stalls

and I have no tangible basis for feeling secure,

yet will I rejoice in the LORD,

I will be joyful in God my Savior.

The Sovereign LORD is my strength;

he makes my feet like the feet of a deer,

he enables me to go on the heights.

(Hab. 3:17-19)

S705252-Can_you_see_the_jaguar_in_the_picture-Cuscohifting our foundation from doubt to confidence, from terror to enjoyment, from rage to worship will occur only when something stirs within us that makes us long, more than anything else, to build our lives on the reality of God.  But we’re not there yet.  No one is, not fully.  With doubt, terror, and rage filling our hearts, we turn to others, not to love them, but to get from them at least a little of what we need.  Bent on relief from our pain and revenge against God, we enter into relationships with the desperate cry that seems so reasonable: “I need you!”  And that cry moves us into the first floor of the fallen structure…When we live to get from others (and everyone does who suspects that God isn’t good), the results are always the same: inevitable disappointment, temporary fulfillment, and bitter loneliness.  When we doubt God and turn away from him to cry to others, “I need you,” we never stop crying.” ((Larry Crabb, Finding God, Zondervan 1993, 108-109.))

I’ve got a new attitude!

6236864_SS When my children were little, a discipline technique I used when they began to act up was to look them in the eye and ask, “Do you need an attitude adjustment?”   Because I had laid an earlier foundation of what an attitude adjustment was, this question seemed to have a magical recuperative power.  What had moments before been bad behavior suddenly was replaced with good behavior.

I thought of this as I was considering the truth contained in the following verses:

“The LORD your God will circumcise your hearts and the hearts of your descendants, so that you may love him with all your heart and with all your soul, and live.”  (Deuteronomy 30:6)

“and I will make an everlasting covenant with them, that I will not turn away from following them, to do them good; and I will put my fear in their hearts, that they may not depart from me.”  (Jeremiah 32:40)

“I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws.” (Ezekiel 36:26)

It strikes me as marvelous good news that God has implanted within us a new attitude–a new disposition that inclines toward loving Him and not wanting to depart!  This is what the Apostle Paul was referring to when he stated, “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! All this is from God…” (2 Corinthians 5:17)  I forget this truth and often pray asking God to give me love for others, give me a heart that desires to affirm rather than to be affirmed, give me a forgiving heart.  The restful wonder of what it means to be “in Christ” is that He already has! 

“These new inclinations for doing God’s will were given to you before the light of Scripture ever brought any aspect of God’s will to your attention.  James calls it “the implanted word,” which he tells us to receive with meekness.”  James is saying in essence, “Take hold of what you already have, that which is innate to your new nature.”  Ponder with your mind what God has already made your heart desire!

The birthright of every believer is an inner self that’s supernaturally inscribed with the whole of Christ’s teachings and commands–even to the extent that “we have the mind of Christ” as Scripture says.

Every command we come across in the Bible is therefore a vigorous reminder to do what we already desire.  The Scriptures simply clarify in our minds what we already want to do in our regenerate heart.”  ((Dwight Edwards, Revolution Within, p.112))

What an awesome truth!  How encouraging that today my task is not to plead with God to give me something to help me through the circumstances of life but to appropriate what He has already given and praise Him for His great generosity!

Top and Bottom of the Morning

December 6, 2003

Greetings!

rain The day started with me practically in a panic but it has calmed down and I have managed a nap!  It was raining cats and dogs at 5:00 when I got up this morning.  I headed out with rubber boots and umbrella to “assist” the new cook who was on breakfast duty for the first time.

It turns out I was the breakfast cook for 16 children and 3 mamas today!  When I realized I was on, I reminded myself of “Lucy” in the episode where she was working in the bakery–we both had no business doing what we were trying to do!

Susan, the new cook, did arrive drenched and apologetic at 7:20.  She has no watch or alarm clock–again, we expect the Africans to have items that they deem unnecessary and too expensive–it is a miracle that she arrived when she did.  Over and over, I am learning that exact time is only important to us muzungus who keep schedules–no right minded African would have ventured forth in such a downpour;  they wait on the bad weather to pass and then resume activities. We, howevDSC00552 (Small)er, allow the schedule to determine our activities.

Well, the reality was that 16 hungry children and 3 tired mamas were going to be arriving and so cooking was needed.  I had to call Mike out of bed to come and light the gas stove and get the grill to work.  We have been having problems with it igniting and this morning was no exception. Things might have gone smoother if I had been familiar with where things were stored but since I was in a huge commercial facility, the way I found things was to open every cabinet. When the children arrived and lined up at the wash basin, the pancakes were coming off the grill!  Yeah! I stuck around to make sure our dishwasher showed and then headed home to regroup.DSC00556

It continues to rain and Casey and I are just staying in.  I am now taking worm medicine after some suspicious symptoms and it seems I have gotten the fungal ringworm that is going around as well.  I did some preparation for our weekly ROS meeting and it was an encouraging time.  I drove the Enis’ to Entebbe so that they could catch their flight home for furlough.  It was a restful trip, good to be alone for a while.  We had an encouraging ROS meeting last night.  Shirlene shared that one of the girls at the girl’s vocational center became aware of her salvation yesterday and there was much rejoicing over that.

 

Carolyn and I really wanted to get Molly from Sanyu and get her settled at Molly (Small)Rafiki before her furlough, so sweet Molly has arrived! She cried a lot her first night but the next morning she was very satisfied drinking morning chai with her new brothers.   Molly&family (Small) MollySponsorWinter2004 (Small)She is giving our very serious Mama Teopista a run for her money, there is a precocious personality behind those saucer eyes!  DSC01749 (Small) She squeals the highest pitch squeal you’ve ever heard when she is disturbed about anything.   Somehow Teopista finds that delightful instead of infuriating, she throws her head back and smiles and says, “JjaJa, this one is very stubborn!”  I had to learn that that word means “bright” or “smart” and not obstinate as we Americans mean it when we use the word.  DSC00961 (Small) Teopista raised 2 boys of her own and loves finally having a little girl.  Molly is not ready to handle the solid food that we serve in the dining hall, so we are running to town to get formula so she can drink her calories. It is so encouraging that we are starting to be entrusted with the babies.  I think how much healthier they will be with a good diet and personal attention in their early months.

better close now–love you bunches,

lissa

December 12, 2003

Dear Friend,

It has been a difficult week for me — not in work or anything other than my spirit refusing to be content in Christ. Woven in  and around that disquiet is that James seems to be aware that his time is drawing short and is purposing to savor all that he can while here.  That is a good thing; but it makes real that the end is near as I observe him getting up early to visit with his Dad, joining me at play time with the children, sitting and wanting to spend time talking with me, and walking around and photographing his favorite sites here around the village.  It has been a huge blessing to have him here with us.
Garden City Today we bought a little artificial Christmas tree at Uchumi’s–our Korean owned supermarket chain that we liken to Ukrops.  This little tree has 160 lights and that really is enough to make the effect.  I didn’t think I wanted a tree this year.  The surroundings do not resemble wintry Christmas card scenes and I have always had a hard time thinking you can have Christmas in a Southern California or Florida setting!

In the end, sentiment won out. I did want to have some moments during the holidays when I could turn off all the lights and sit on the sofa and enjoy twinkling, festive colors.  I am planning a special lunch meal and Christmas Day worship service for the staff and children.  Pastor Fred is considering coming here and leading us in worship before he tends to his own flock at Central Baptist. Uchumi

I went to Owino market which is the place we go to buy clothes for the children–I think I’ve told you about it –a huge market of second hand clothing from Europe and America.  James asked for that trip to be his Christmas present.  He got t-shirts and I was able to get 25 pieces of clothing for the children and 2 pairs of shoes for $10. As I was crossing the street to wait on Mike to return and pick us up , a thief ran up behind me and jerked my gold necklace off my neck.  So surprised and stunned, all I could think to do was to call him a SOB. Not a great witness moment!  I was a fool for wearing it–I had just forgotten it was on.

The good news is it cannot be stolen twice and it is gone and I need not worry or plan how to keep it anymore. You know Jane, as I stood on the corner, I cried–not for the loss of the necklace– but that circumstance of being robbed seemed to serve as a hub around which many pent up emotions coalesced and found expression.  Standing there feeling helpless with tears streaming, questions surfaced and my mind asked, “How much more stripping Lord?  It feels like my culture, my home, my family, my friends, teaching, singing, money, privacy, time to do nothing, time to study, my sense of knowing how to do life, the ease of moving around, all of it has been snatched like that necklace! How much more?”

I am ashamed of those thoughts and thankful to God that under the watchful gaze of my housegirl Flavia and James I recovered. I was able to see in Flavia’s eyes such a sense of hurt that I had been “abused” that I wanted to straighten up and not cause her pain.  I surely didn’t want to be another rich American crying over the loss of a material possession as I stood in the street surrounded by hundreds of people who did not know if they would have food today or not!

James spoke clarifying words and warned me not to become bitter or to let myself become suspicious or fearful.  The Lord met me with much grace and responded to my self-pitying question as I was preparing for the ROS Bible study meeting.  We are working through Matthew together and this week we focused on the Beatitudes.  He fed me promise after promise and I am grateful.  By the end of my preparation I was settled in my heart and marveling at the blessedness of having all that hinders God stripped away!

With much love,
lissa

Entertaining Angels Unawares

October 29, 2003

Hey Friend,

The child we were with yesterday is adorable–his parents are dead and he has been staying in an army barracks with Ugandan soldiers.  The man who took him in has been called up north to Gulu to fight the rebels there.  What that has meant is that Yoweri is being passed around like a football and maybe even taking care of himself.Visiting with Yoweri

When Carolyn and I picked him up to go for a blood screening, he was living at a “restaurant” with people who seemed not to care for him at all.  They must have hoped he would come to stay with us because they did have him dressed and clean so he would make a good impression.

This little boy has lost both parents to HIV and we are praying that his test is clear so he can come here.  We had an enjoyable morning with him,  I could tell that he had absorbed the male influence as he lived the soldier life. Beer sign (Small) As we drove through Kampala, he pointed out every beer billboard to us yelling excitedly, “Look, bee-ah”.  When he urinates he also knows how to aim and hit the target, hitting the center of the toilet rather than the wall and the seat or the floor is no problem for him! That is a skill we are hoping he will share with our other boys–after all it is a training center!  We will take the bad with the good!DSCN3942

We had a school conference at Heritage International school last week.  Casey’s teachers told us she is remarkably adjusted for someone who has been uprooted and brought to Africa.  Her Bible teacher says she regularly puts in prayer requests for the ministry here and that she sees herself as part of it.  She says that is rare–MKs are notorious for resenting being dragged into ministry by their parents.  It was good to hear.

BrighterMolly Carolyn and I are off to Sanyu this morning to set our eyes on a little girl named Molly.  We hope to bring her to Rafiki if her tests are all clear.  Finding adoptable girls is not easy–families will struggle to keep their girls since the future promises a bride price when she marries.  We got the 2004 Rafiki calendars yesterday and our kids are well represented. Samson Kisekka is on the front cover and others throughout.  It was fun to see.Molly1

Oh dear one, in your thoughts about wanting God’s mercy regarding giving–that subject stays in my living here.  You know God has mercifully protected us from taking pride in all that we have “given up”.  He brought us here and placed us in the midst of a people who stare in wide eyed wonderment at all the stuff we have.

I really saw this last week when Carolyn invited a very old woman to come and visit us in the village.  She is a neighbor who lives right outside the main gate.  I keep thinking how rich she would be if she could sell the loofas off her big tree to Bath & Body stores!  This JjaJa (Grandmother) has been very offended that we came and built right in the middle of “her” garden path and have not even allowed her in the gate to greet and visit.  She sat in Carolyn’s sparsely furnished living room looking around and said, “You have many things.  When someone comes to visit they would not have to fear there would be no space to sleep–your floor is very large!”

So to these having a large floor is a luxury much less a washer, cold box, radio, automobile, coffee maker, mattresses, and multiple changes of clothes.  It is very easy to see we have not given up much at all!   Carolyn served her a Coke and she broke out in a huge smile and said, “You have made me a party!”  She is probably in her late 60’s–a real JjaJa– she is somewhat of a character around here and her more upstanding neighbors make fun of her love of banana wine and resist associating with her.  I was glad we did not know it was scandalous to entertain her!  She reciprocated by sending two sugar canes to the children for them to chew on. DSC01433 (Small)

All I know my friend is the grace to give is like all the others–a gift — and I pray that more missions committees will begin to long for the gift rather than fear it.  I also know how huge the temptation to want more is when there is more around–I am not noble in not wanting a larger wardrobe here–I just am hemmed in because there is nothing to be tempted by!  My Ugandan sisters hold my heart in check by saying –“Another new dress JjaJa?”   I have worn the same dresses out of the suitcases we brought for these 3 months.  Now that our boxes have arrived and I have more options, I am ashamed of having so much!   DSC01469 (Small) Well, I need to get ready to take Chloe to the clinic for immunizations.  Carolyn is pressing to get little Yoweri here with us by the end of the week.  We both have been haunted by his face when we returned him to the restaurant.

His mercy —my hope today!  Oh, as we went over John 6 emphasizing that salvation is God’s initiating mercy–that no one comes unless the Father draws him.  Mama Jenipher said, “Es-chuse me JjaJa–there is something I have failed to ask.  I know that it is God who decides who will believe and who will not –but does that mean that it is not the unbeliever’s fault that they do not believe?”  Needless to say, we jumped off into Romans 1 and had a thrilling time marveling at the mystery of all that is revealed there.

Tis mercy all!
lissa

He Made me a Polished Arrow

Helen (Small) Helen Roseveare had just graduated from medical school when she moved to the Belgian Congo to serve as a doctor to local tribes. She built a hospital made of handcrafted bricks, stocked it with medicines, and for 12 years treated malnutrition, nursed lepers, delivered babies, and performed amputations.

Her work there was tragically interrupted with the onset of a bloody revolution. On August 8, 1964, the Republic of Congo was plunged into a civil war. That day marked the beginning of five terrible months of savage brutality during which 27 missionaries were killed, more than 200 Roman Catholic priests and nuns were murdered, and nearly a quarter of a million innocent African civilians were butchered.

Roseveare was rescued from the carnage, along with many others. She returned temporarily to her home in England to heal from her anguish and to share her story.

But when this woman known by the nationals affectionately as “Mama Luka” spoke of her experiences in the Congo, a provocative question repeatedly surfaced: “Why did God let you suffer?”

The reality of a missionary, who laid out her life to serve God only to be rewarded with cruelty and suffering, seemed incongruous. Routinely people in search of answers unburdened their hearts to Roseveare: a young mother whose baby drowned, a girl who was raped — people who lived in angst, unable to connect the dissonance of life’s experiences to the God of the Bible. Her answer became simply to share with them how God had given her faith and strength to overcome her own heart-wrenching trials.

paediatric-600Invited to address the question of suffering with a small gathering one night she first quoted Isaiah 49:2, “He made my mouth like a sharp sword; in the shadow of His hand He hid me; He made me a polished arrow;  She reached backward toward the mantel and eased a long-stemmed rose bud from a tall vase. As she spoke, she broke off the thorns, the leaves, the petals, the green outer layer of stem – every element that makes a rose and rose. All that was left was a lithe, straight shaft. The pieces that lay on the floor were not bad things. But, she explained, they had to be removed if she were going to make an arrow. God does this to us, she said. He removes everything – even innocent, good things – that hinders us from being the arrows.  He strips and sands and polishes so that he can shoot the arrow for his purposes at his intended target.”

Independence was declared in the Belgian Congo on June 30, 1960. Mutiny broke out in the army, the white population fled, and interracial relations crumbled. “It nearly broke my heart,” says Roseveare. “It wasn’t only in the upper echelons of government, it wasn’t even just in local government, it was in the church.” A colleague once told her, “Well doctor, we don’t blame you for being white. In fact, we’re really rather sorry for you being white. But at the end of the day you are white.” Her beloved friends no longer trusted her.  She prayed and fasted fervently, seeking God’s face for reconciliation.

Then came the rebellion and a terrible night that transformed her faith.

“It was a Saturday afternoon,” recalls Roseveare. “A truck drove into the village where I lived, and I could hear the noise from house of rough, angry voices shouting. And then two men burst into my home. That was the first indication I had that we were at war. “[The men] inspected everything and smashed a lot of my property, and then I suddenly realized that they were intent on evil. I tried to run away and hide, and they came with powerful torches, and they found me. They struck me, they beat me. I lost my back teeth to the boot of a rebel soldier that night. They broke my glasses I can’t focus on anything if I haven’t got them on. That was most frightening. When you can see them, you can at least put an arm up to take the blow. When you can’t see, you’re so defenseless.” During the course of the evening, Roseveare was badly violated by her perpetrators. “I don’t think I was praying; I was numb with horror, dread, fear. If I had prayed, I think I would have prayed, “My God, my God, why has thou forsaken me?” I felt He’d left me. I didn’t doubt God. I never doubted God. But I felt, for that moment, that He’d left me to handle the situation by myself.

cg-150As these thoughts poured into her mind, Roseveare became aware of a holy presence near her. “I knew with every fiber in my being that God, the almighty Creator, was there,” she pronounces with quiet certainty, insisting that God never gives us evil, but takes what is intended for evil and makes it good.

During the pinnacle of her suffering, God spoke to Roseveare in a way that He knew she would understand and accept. “I believe the words that God spoke to me, although I didn’t hear them as words, were,

“Can you thank Me for trusting you with this, even if I never tell you why?”

You know, that’s shattering. You and I think of us trusting Him. But the thought that He wants to trust us, that was something very new to my thinking.”

He gave her the strength to say yes and she prayed, “Yes, God. If somehow, somewhere this fits for purposes, I don’t know how, but yes, thank You, God, for trusting me with this.” God did not take away the wickedness, the cruelty, or the pain. It was still there. But He turned her fear into peace.

Roseveare and her fellow missionaries endured faithfully that long and dreadful weekend. The following Tuesday the rebels returned for her. She was taken away by herself in the middle of the night. As dawn broke, they came to a village. The rebel soldiers had gathered nearly 800 local men into the village square. They had been told they would attend a people’s court in which Roseveare would be tried for the things that had occurred the previous week. At the given signal they were instructed to shout, “She’s a liar! She’s a liar!” They would then be asked, “What will we do with her?” The mandated response was, “Modecco! Modecco!” which meant “Crucify her! Crucify her!” The defendant knew she would die, although she did not know how.

The trial scene began.

“They wanted me to go through in detail in front of these 800 men what had happened the previous Thursday,” Roseveare says, an audible quiver in her voice. “I wasn’t going to speak up in front of all those men. They struck me over the face with the butt end of a gun; I couldn’t stand the pain so I spoke up.”

The moment of judgement came.

Roseveare couldn’t see her jury; her eyes had nearly closed with the swellings of the beatings. But she could hear. “I heard a sound I had never heard before and will probably never hear again. I heard 800 strong farming men break down and cry.

They were weeping.”

Now, instead of seeing her as the hated white foreigner, they saw her as their doctor.

“They have a word in Kibudu, which means “blood of our blood, bone of our bone,” she says. “They rushed forward and said, “She’s ours. Helen2 She’s ours.”

They took me into their arms and pushed the rebel soldiers out of the way.

“In that moment the black/white division disappeared,” she professes triumphantly.

“I can honestly say, right through till today, in that area there has never been a black/white division again. We’re all one in Christ Jesus.”

When she fervently sought the Lord so many years before, she had no idea that God would make her an instrument in bringing about racial harmony.

Why does a God of love allow suffering?

For Roseveare that question is, in itself, a contradiction. Love and suffering are inextricably linked.

“If you didn’t love, you wouldn’t hurt,” she explains, pointing to her exemplar as evidence.

God loves us so much that He gave His own son to the Cross. Because He loves, He suffered, giving us an example to follow in His steps. (1 Peter 2:21)”

In the years following the brutality that she suffered she recounted other thoughts that were in her mind as she was insulted, cursed and abused.  “Suddenly Christ had been there.  No vision, no voice, but His very real presence.  A phrase came into my mind, “led as a lamb to the slaughter”, one outstanding fact seemed to dominate:  For my sake, He went as a willing sacrifice.  Then, as swiftly, He spoke into my heart: “They’re not fighting you: these blows, all this wickedness, is against Me. All I ask of you is the loan of your body.  Will you share with Me one hour in My sufferings for these who need My love through you?”

She looked back later on this whole period and wrote: ‘We learned why God has given us His name as I AM (Exodus 3:14). His grace always proved itself sufficient in the moment of need, but never before the necessary time.

“He Gave Us a Valley”, Helen Roseveare, p.36,

“Arrrows in the Hands of God”, Challis.com, June 15, 2005

“Can you thank me?” an interview with Helen Roseveare, Tonya Stoneman