May 4, 2004
There seems to be a new level of tiredness that has entered my spirit–we have lost two mamas and fired a third and are trying to operate the cottages with women who are not yet sure what their responsibilities are. I am out of the house more than ever. Jane, I find myself in open conversation with the Lord almost all the time.
Today as I walked between cottages rectifying misunderstandings with the aunties, I said, “Lord, If I was not sure that you are the lover of my soul and the one who is steering me around endless relational potholes today—I would be despairing. As it is, you know my weakness–I am just bone tired and longing for rest.” Later, I was checking on Molly who has a huge knot under her ear and is causing me some concern. While carrying her, I tripped over a tricycle, I tried to protect her and made every bone in my body sore in the fall that we took. She giggled like I was playing a game with her. I am hoping I can get out of bed tomorrow but will take it as a gift from the Jesus who hears and answers if not! 🙂 When Molly spent the night with us we took a picture of her that made us roll–it looks like a “Got Milk?” commercial!
May 5, 2004
I slept so hard last night until I have those sheet creases pressed into my skin this morning! The children will be fascinated by them–they don’t miss a trick and ask about every bump and blemish on my body. How are you this morning? Today, I lead Mama Robinah and the aunties in a study of Gen. 13 & 14–the stories that involve Lot and the war between the 4 kings and the 5 kings.
Auntie Rose came to Bible study for the first time last week and her heart was so lifted. She is the one who was working for us for a couple of months when we realized her eyesight was very bad. She had asked for a Bible and Carolyn and I gave her one. When she opened the pages and looked down, she asked, “JjaJa, why are the words smeared?” We got her some reading glasses and she was thrilled to see things that were not clear before.
At the end of Bible study, I asked if there were ways they wanted me to pray for them personally. I mentioned that since we had just studied Abram’s plan to solve the problem of famine in his own strength — if they were facing any famines and needed prayer. Rose who is the most self protective African woman I have ever met and one who does not like to show any type of inadequacy said with uncustomary excitement, “JjaJa, pray for me in having a desire to read the Bible.” She went on to say, “I was raised Catholic and was never taught this book. When I became a “born again” I heard how important it was to read the Bible. I have always felt guilty that I don’t know it and when I try to read it I fall asleep. I can never see the point of what I am reading. But today, I have enjoyed this so much–I would never have gotten anything from the story if I had not been here to listen. I feel like I have been asleep and am waking up.”
Jane pray that God gives her a great desire to know Him in His word–as we talked the other night, we both know it is a great gift to have a heart that loves the Scripture. That moment with Rose put more wind in my sails that I have tasted in some weeks. She was in the Bible Study because she is filling in for Flavia who has abandoned her role as mama.
What a God we serve–I am so grateful for the privilege of serving these children. Oh friend, we have a God who is a Rock–He is truly my steadfast love, my stronghold and my deliverer–a strong fortress and shield–He is able to subdue the enemies within me and without–whom shall I fear today? May you find Him a wonderful refuge–I will love hearing the new song that you will sing to Him.
In the steadfast love of the Lord